Hello my name is Valerie Schache (Val). I’m 67 and I live near Ballina NSW Australia. I have dementia and I continue as the long term care partner for my husband with complex needs since 2004 . I was diagnosed August 2015 when I was 63. I was not supported, just given a dementia drug and ‘bye’. I’m still not tagged; I don’t fit the requirements for NeuRa Frontier etc and am left to my own devices to find a way through the minefield of deficits.
My paid skills were as acupuncturist physiotherapist including complex pain in de-mentia aged care. I’m also a life time farmer. I thank my country upbringing and wise parents who included me in ‘Why is this so’ type of discoveries. I have massive cognitive reserves to cope with the diverse defi-cits says my neuropsychologist assessors. We pioneered in farming and I in allied health and I now pioneer best health practices in the dementia space.
I Thank God for DAI [Dementia Alliance International]. I was unravelling – not supported – not being believed; stigmatized and isolated to near oblivion and self harm.
My first DAI zoom in 2016, with a mob of diverse people globally with dementia—I laughed for the first time post diagnosis as I participated; I didn’t have to pretend in this group. I was encouraged to seek the latest ideas and I improved cognitively with the Bredesen type protocol. I then got angry that the ‘establishment’ weren’t right, that nothing could change a dementia journey. I became motivated enough to give back and educate for inclusion of my dementia disability—my human right; for suitable rehabilitation to keep me well and kindness. I have pre-sented globally nationally and now locally. Facebook has been my ‘work’ pre-dementia so I now also have an active group ‘Val’s journey –dementia is a word not a sentence’ and comment often on other sites. I am gifted at reading research papers and gleaning the nuggets of change for the better from diverse sources.
Advantages of dementia: yes, there are some.
I’ve found who my handful of friends really are. My personality type changing deficits means I’m now stronger minded. opinionated; my language is colorful, pithy and sometimes to the point. My ‘bull-shit’ meter is accentuated and I certainly won’t be patronised or treated as less because I have a neurodegenerative disease. I tackle things from the front foot.
Yes I can only now do one thing at a time– but then so do most men. Passionate, fearless bold as a hyena I help tackle issues especially if injustice is involved. I can still read a scientific paper of any genre and give you back six points in plain speak to any audience. My considerable savant knowledge is exposed and I’m well read.
Disadvantages of dementia: yes!
In my ‘bestment’s’ words ‘It’s a pain in the ‘butt’ —I want my old Val back’ – it wont happen this side of eternity but I’m committed to her and we support each other and its ongoing. We are a great team. I struggle to be OK with the flamboyant new me. I have constant grief as I have brain ‘rat gnaws’ and I wonder what’s gone this time and can I get around it!
I hate having disturbed bodily functions; to always be reminded to remember what I need to take especially if I am distracted. I hate needing to pace myself, and accepting increasing support from others.
To be told ‘you don’t look like you have dementia’ – deep breathe Val– that is such an insulting reflex comment—one you would not say to someone with diabetes etc.
I have a DNR bracelet and all our legal affairs are in order so I don’t have to think about that part of the future except with joy at going home.
I know dementia’s for over fifty years, observation and then worked as an acupuncturist physio for 32 yrs; a decade in a locked dementia ward and since 2005 have supported dozens of friends to die with dementia. But I say dementia should be rare—not an epidemic.
What’s changed since the 1950’s?
Lets consider plastics, diesel fumes, atomic bombs, margarines and cholesterol issues/reduction and less sleep /increased stress and now obesity. It’s onset can be slowed even preventable with diet, BP/ Weight control. I say ‘If great grandma wont recognize it , its not food’ e.g. margarines. Hundreds of us in dozens of countries are creating a quiet revolution of change- confounding the ‘experts’ by reversing /slowing dementia– bringing hope to those able to follow a personalized precise protocol.
Back to basics of having health gut biomes for a healthy brain. Removing allergens including foods and environmental toxins especially mold. Team Val use hair analysis blood tests supplements and other hands on best practice to improve me holistically. Being mindful, stress controlled, sleeping soundly, very kind to yourself and at peace with those around you. Live in the moment as it is your pre-sent. I have hope, I have significantly improved in many markers since 2015 and I have dementia.
Its not the future I would have chosen, but we are making the best of this deal and giving back . We laugh and love freely. I aim to ease the life of all the other thousands pre and post dementia diagnosed. I’ve always smashed ‘glass ceilings’ so I’m breaking down the myths /assumptions about de-mentia, boldly and in every avenue presented to, or created by me.
Don’t be like dementia, it doesn’t discriminate, it is a disability, and it is unkind. Be aware not to discriminate, be inclusive and be especially kind to all, and do everything to slow or prevent the onset of dementia for your own sake.
Valerie Schache © 2019